Wendy. Periodically. Keeping Your Good Intentions.
I will begin this essay with a plug for my book for you new therapists out there (although those interested in making changes to their behavior would get a lot my book, too! ). In one section of “The Portable Supervisor: The Essential Guide for Students and New Mental Health Professionals,” I talk about a great morning routine you can teach your clients that will change the landscape of each day. In my book, I discuss the importance of intentions and how to master your emotional day. I will give you a little teaser from the book, but before I do, I want to share this insight:
Making changes to our habits, as well all know, comes complete with psychological climbing walls. To succeed we need to navigate the thinking traps straight uphill in order to finally reach that doggone bell. AND THEN WE HAVE TO DO IT AGAIN, and again, until the wall becomes one we can step over. Who would even want to try? It turns out we are a forgetful and hopeful species full of good intentions to change. We, however, go about changing in a haphazard way doomed to our psychological habits UNLESS we have support, information, and get ahold of our traps at the beginning of the day, and checking in throughout the day.
Now for the teaser. When combined with other practices (that you can find in my book and of course elsewhere), you can begin keeping your New Year’s intentions and get a much better hold of your emotional day. Below is a tool, but it doesn’t exist as a cure-all. So keep your counseling appointments and your other coping strategies, and add this one to your tool box.
The Intentional Wake-Up
Applying many of the concepts of emotional agility, I’ve evolved a creative practice I call The Intentional Wake Up. It’s about being mindful of your thoughts from the moment you’re conscious and setting a practice of intention for the day from the very start. I encourage my clients to ask themselves a series of questions:
How do I want to feel today?
What am I going to do and say to myself to create that feeling?
How do I want to handle things when something goes awry?
How do I want to show up for myself and others?
What will be my stumbling blocks and how can I overcome them?
Who do I need to identify who will support me?
Who is succeeding at this that will help me hold myself accountable?
This simple mental practice can be and has been a game changer for people. When clients practice these skills they’re doing mental prep for their day. And when they mindfully think about their intentions and follow through diligently they’re on their way to rewiring their brain. But how to achieve that diligence? Clients need to create accountability by putting systems in place. One way is for your client to involve a trusted ally and make them aware of their practice by asking themselves, “Who will know that I’m working on this?” Clients can also keep a journal or use an app to write down their progress each day. Combine this with SMART goal setting, and you are on your way to making changes.
